Extra Extra!

My second week of school has ended. I can't its already been a week. I feel like I'm not in the swing yet (I'm a late bloomer). Yet I am so busy. I'm taking 16 units, which includes working for the campus paper. So I'll spend my time either in class, studying/doing homework, and working as reporter and assistant features editor for Viewpoints. I'm also supposed to get a job along side of the web design/editing for a broker's website form my mom's office. Where will I find the time to do anything? I have no clue!! I confess that I feel a bit overwhelmed when I think of it all. I have already been assigned a story to write and the deadline is Wednesday of next week and I cant interview my subject till Monday. It's gonna be one hell of a week. I'll also be finding out if I got the job at the coffee house. Agh I'm so anxious and worried about what the future holds that it is hard for me to focus on the present.

The recession is really kicking butt. It has forced my to grow up a lot more quickly than I had planned or imagined. And when I mean "grow up," I mean take on more responsibility like an adult. Expenses placed on me.

I'm gonna stop writing now cause I feel like I'm doing a "dear dear, my life sucks.." entry and I didn't want my blog to be about that so I'll stop now.

To end on a happier note:
I'm one of three assistant feature editors and I'm going to have my first story for Viewpoints published next week, hopefully! YAY! And it looks like I'll have a car to drive very soon. My uncle and dad have been working hard on getting our Previa running again so my mom doesn't have to be my chauffeur to and fro. God provides!! I need prayer to stay focused on what needs to be done so I don't end up procrastinating.

peace and love~

I'm drawn

Got this picture from Style Magnet blog. A very fun blog to look at. It inspires me.

What a couple of few weeks I have been having! It has kept me from my blogging as you can see. So I apologize for that. I started school on Monday and it has been a whirling roller coaster.
It has been a total disaster here at school. With the budget crisis, Riverside Community College was greatly affected. Hundreds of classes were cut and tuition was raised. Hundreds of students were dropped from classes for ridiculous reasons. The tension on campus has been intense, to say the least. But after days of attending classes to see if there is any space for desperate lil' me, I have managed to acquire 16 units. YES! SUCCESS~

I'm exhausted and have much to do already. If the first week of school is like this, I'm afraid I am not much looking forward to this semester.

Hope your week wasn't as outlandishly and ridiculously stressed as mine.

Dreamer

Right now, I am completely re-organizing my room. Quite enjoying it, actually. This has put me in a decorative mood and want to hang this string of lovelies on the wall above my bed and pretty up my window. Found from Lobster and Swan.

Hope your day was sweet. :)

We could've had something great

Isn't it so small and cute? This is the Honda Fit. I was going to own one of these awesome cars through the Cars for Clunkers program. The deal was I was going to turn in my 1999 gas-guzzling minus A/C Suburban with 250,000 miles on it and drive home with a Fit. But no!
The dealership failed to completely gives all details required to turning our clunker. So, in a nutshell and to avoid me writing a raging wrathful blog post, the deal didn't happen and I now have no car at all to drive.

I am now on the constant look out for a car that is cheap, runs, gets decent mpg and preferably has A/C. Estoy triste because just today I have seen 4, YES FOUR, Fits driving on the street. One even parked next to me.

Sigh

Flying high

Finally! They are here!

My belated debriefing of my trip to the East Coast.

As you may know, I went to Connecticut in May for my cousin Alyssa's graduation from the Coast Guard Academy.

And I have for you here pictures from my travels to Connecticut!

Shot from the airplane. Sweet.

They call this the "parade." Its a drill where the stand with their company and they present the colors and fire the cannons! Its really cool to watch.

Alyssa with her mom and brother Bradley at graduation. She is now Ensign Alyssa Van Delden!

The graduation ceremony. The Secretary of Homeland Security was their speaker.

Got to see my cousin, Christine's baby, Devin. SOO adorable and soo happy.

Took a train to the Big Apple!

You don't realize how crazy it is until you're there. And you literally have to walk everywhere.

This is Times Square.

Saw the huge Toys R' Us store

Trump Tower.

Went to Tiffany Co.

Fifth Avenue.

Visited the Famous Central Park. Another place you don't realize the hugeness of size. But it definitely grand!

Drove to Boston with my cousin Pierre and Brad and sister Ingrid. I'm pretty sure I definitely want to live here. All of the buildings are brick and there's a lovely harbor.

*(from left) Bradley, me, Pierre at the harbor in Boston!

Made a stop in New Haven and fell in love with Yale. If I'm going to grad school, it would be here or NYU. Vanessa almost went here....<3

I'm pretty sure this is the Sterling Memorial library at Yale. There is gorgeous architecture here. There's a hallway in this library that had pillars so intricately carved I could study them forever. Oh, and the stain glass windows! Drool...

Our last visit for the trip was Newport, Rhode Island. We did the mansion walk. If you have never heard of this, there's a path you can walk long the cliff in Newport and along these cliffs are huge, amazing, stunning mansions. NAY! Castles!

This house left me breathless. For sure my favorite from the ones I was able to see. We didn't do the whole walk because its actually really long and it started to rain. I was awestruck when I saw this house. First off, it had a gorgeous tall rod-ironed fence for an entrance with brick pillars. There was a perfectly tended to garden and shrubs surround the perimeter of the property. Oh to be wealthy...

Well, that concludes a summary of my trip to the east coast. Very much in love with it. My kinda environment. I loved that all the houses on the eastern coast were so different and seemed to hold a piece of our country's history in its very foundation, unlike the cookie-cutter houses here in California. :(

I'd love to go back soon and spend more time in New York and Boston and visit the surroundings states. Hope you enjoyed and again my apologies for taking so long to post these.

STOMP on de replay

I adore this song

Mat Kearney- Closer to love

Update:

SO the monster on my eye is almost gone. A very speedy recovery considering these things could take forever to heal since there isn't much blood flow to the bottom of the eye, thus decreasing a quick recovery time. According to my doctor(very awesome guy), he said my immune system has been fighting my allergies to cats for so long with out me knowing it, that its slowing becoming weak making it harder for it to fight ailments.

As a result, the cats are completely banned from my room and have made a progressive tranistion to being full outside cats to the exception that they eat and drink in our weight room via kitty door. I can't even touch them for a long time.

I hate that I can't do that. I love my kittys so much and didn't even know I was allergic to them until about a year ago. But my rehabilitation has been eased by a few days away from the house when I went on vacation and now I'm staying at aunt's because I'm housesitting for her. She's in Alaska taking my cousin Alyssa, from the Coast Guard, up there. Alyssa just graduated and is now stationed in Kodiak for the next two years.

I also had some blood work done while at the doctor's and found that I'm slightly anemic, am low in phosphorus and my cholesterol is VERY low. He wants my cholesterol to go up a bit to help my anemia and that means eating FATTIER FOODS! yay! haha

Fatty foods in a healthy sense, which includes more meat( which I don't eat much of), dark greens like spinach and broccoli, and oils. For phosphorus, I'm taking calcium magnesium and something he made. They are awful tasting stuff. BLECH...

But I'm glad I finally have a answer to so many years of infliction. Just avoid that cats and take care of my immune system. :)

PS I am now 20 and I feel I'm not ready to let go of my teen years. My excuse for reckless behavior has gone.

Pour 'em out and pop 'em

11 pills before bed + twice already today, being taken since Sunday (3x throughout the day)= 99 pills consumed.

I do not have a drug problem.

I have either a stye or a chalazion on my eye. Its pretty much a clogged eyelash follicle or pore. It is pretty gnarly. I'll spare you looking at a picture of it. I have had it since....(backtracking)...last wed or thursday. And it seems to persist and ruin my self-esteem and ability to want to go out in public.

For treatment, I resolved to home remedies My dad got the whole family hooked on homeopathic medicine so we do all we can to stay away from common practice medicine and use things such as herbs and vitamins to solve our health woes.

When, I first got this "mutation", as I like to call it, I used stye eyedrops and diluted echinacea that i rubbed around my eye with a Q-tip. I moved to putting a warm compressant on it every now and again. That didn't seem to do much so I stopped. I also took echinacea and golden seal in capsule form. I stopped using the echinacea on my eye and used some drops my sister got from our doctor for the cataract-thing on her eye to lubricate it and keep it from irritating the rest of her eye. I had to stop the drops all together either saturday or sunday because my eye felt like I had been swimming in a swimming pool charged with chlorine.

During all of this the growth on my eye has gotten bigger, redder, and kinda hard.

If this is grossing you out, I encourage you to not read any further.

It is on my bottom lid, along my lash line. Tonight, the figure of it is that of those miniture jawbreaker candies but not the tiny ones...one up them.

SUnday, my dad advised me to take a bunch of supplements to help fight this thing.

Bromagest for something. Allergy max, which has some natural antibiotics in it, Boswellia for pain, yes there is some burning and hurting, vitamin d for something, vitamin c for obviously reasons, vitamin e to help digest all of these pills smoothly, an inflammatory mix to ease the inflammation and a bunch of other stuff.

heres my nightly ritual

1. as done throughout the day, put warm compressant on eye for a few minutes

2. get pills out

3. mix vitamin c powder and inflammation tonic together

4. take all of 11 pills with tonic

5. rest easy

It seems to help I guess, the mass isn't any bigger and seems to be coming to the end of its eternal course (oxymoron?).

But I am going to our homeopathic doctor tomorrow to see what he thinks and to see if he can speed up the process being that I have to go to my sister's HS grad on thursday and EVERYONE i know will be there.

wish me luck and speedy recovery.

a toast to ur own health

Our time was short but Epic

so Jaden is gone. I woke up this morning to some very loud chirping. i though it was the birds outside btu nope it was sweet lil Jaden. so i opened his box and tried to give him water...nothing

tried to give him some millet...nothing. But he tried to jump out of the box.

I decided to take him out in my backyard and see what he was doing....he hopped right out of the box and explored around, chirping while he did. Seemed like he was calling for help cause when i went to put him back in the box and screeched and squacked and threatened to bite me. He held his mouth agape...in a defensive position. I decided to leave him but keep an eye..in case i needed to intervene on his behalf. He stayed still unless i backed away from him. Then he would come out from hiding, hopping, chirping.

I discovered he is a mocking bird. Cause I heard another, more mature chirp while he called. An adult mocking bird flew over, looking for him, or wondering where his chirp was coming from. Jaden kept close to the house walls...and the adult wouldnt come near the house. SO they were left waiting for the other. I slowly increased my distance between myself and Jaden, hoping that if i was far away he and the adult would find each other and be on their way. I ended up back in the house and before I knew it I couldnt find Jaden.....

SO thats that. I will miss his little angry face

Not so different

This is Jaden. I found him today at my aunt's house. Well, actually her dog Dixie found him. But I saved him and have taken him home to care for him. He's definitely not a baby baby bird but he looks pretty young still. He let me pick him up no fuss or mess (by mess i mean poo). He's sleeping in my room in a shoe box and a lil bed made of a flet scarf I cut for him. :)

I gave him water and put some bird seed in his box.

If hasn't eaten any by the morning, Ill have to force feed him or go to the pet store to buy meal worms....mmmmm

OH the memories I had as a child. We rescued a bird when i was little. The legendary Buttercup. The baby bird who would jump on the edge o the basket once it was opened, excitingly waiting for her meal, hand-fed to her. The flying lessons........oh baby

So, my new project, so to speak, raising a baby bird :) I can feel my maternal instinct kicking in...haha

Picking up

I realize i havent posted pictured form my recent adventure but Im doing some editing on them to make them look a bit cooler. I feel like lots has happened since I have returned to home base. For one, I have been able to hang out with my friends who are out for he summer! thank Jesus. I have been in dire need of social interaction with people I have history with!! yes!

I had a picnic with my girls, Tawney, Alissa, and Brooke last week.

Saturday, I went ice skating with Andrew and Tawney. Gosh that was something. I haven' t ice skated much in my life. 3 times tops. I was sooo freaked out when i stepped out onto the ice. My dear friends had to hand hold me for a while so I wouldnt accidentally kill myself. But by the end I was by myself, able to skate and go kinda fast. It was seriously like learning how to walk. I felt so retarded. haha

Last Night, I played softball with my young adults group at church and that was a lot of fun! it was just a crazy night and thoroughly enjoyed myself.

Today, My mom and I picked Ingrid up from school and took her to Kola radio station ( 99.9 fm) where she picked up her $1000 prize check. She won a contest where she had to take a picture in front of the Ontario Auto Center sign with a creative spin. It was such a cute picture.

It seems that prize winning runs in the family. You wouldn't believe how many times my mom has won a random selection contest or raffle. RIDICULOUS. Ingrid inherited the luck I suppose.

Classes are almost over and, I know everyone says this, I CANT WAIT. I seriously can't though. Not only cause I'll have the freedom and sweetness of summer but I don't have to go to my classes anymore. I mean, they were so boring for me this semester. They were just too easy. I feel like i haven't learned anything new this semester. But Im super excited for the fall schedule. I plan on making it as exciting and as challenging as ever!

Well, just an update and a reminder I'm still alive and kicking it! haha I will edit pics quickly and post soon!! THATS A PROMISE!!

also, I really want to start up some sewing projects. My sister, nessa, challenged me to to the fat fabric swap thing. I think Im gonna do it. Although I dont really know how to quilt but I will teach myself. yay!

ill be posting soon! have a super fantastic day!!

Dunkin, Uniforms and Air travel OH MY!!

O'kay I am back from the east coast!

Connecticut to be more correct, meaning that was the whole purpose i went. Twas my cousin Alyssa's Graduation from the Coast Guard Academy. I'm so proud of her<3 I shall soon post pictures as soon as i get back on cali time and in the swing of things. And as soon as that occurs I will hsow lovely photos and tell of my many adventures and encounters with the beings of the east side of America. They are different for sure.

Why does this post look diff? I just found that can change fonts/colors my going to the compose instead edit html part of the posting section for my blog. Im smart. I promise.

Just not technologically savvy.

They should make a pill for this..

I have been lacking motivation to do, well, anything this past week but I am done.
I was telling my mom that I wished I was almost obsessively clean and organized. My room is somewhat clean right now but I wish it looked like a magazine room, where everything is perfectly placed and everything dusted to perfection. I think this would very much help with y sensitive allergies. I've been ok with the cats the last month or so but they all decided that my room was their favorite room and thus proceeded to camp out in my room leaving trails of cat fur everywhere in my room.
Today I will clean my room from top to bottom and from wall to wall.
Also, looking for a job.
Its not easy in this economy to look for a job you like. I would much prefer not to work in food service (been there done that). I wouldnt mind a coffee shop, would love a bookstore or the museum downtown. we shall see. I think Im going to also look into the Press Enterprise and the Wall Street Journal.

WIsh me luck and motivation

So artificially Sweet

Its Wedensday and I am somewhat pensive.

These past few days I have just been pondering about life. The past, present and frightful future. I have been thinking so much about it, in fact, that I actually dream about it. The dreams are only small snippets of memories as a child and dreams that reveal my desires and wishes.

As I have said before I believe that I have been brought home to figure out what my purpose in life is and to develop into a more mature and independent person. It might seem impossible to become independent while living at home with my parents but I think that in other aspects of my life I am becoming more self-reliant.

I think slowing the Lord in opening up his plan for my life to me. I couldn't tell you where He is leading me right now. I don't know if I will continue pursuing journalism or if I will choose to do something else. The only evidence I have for God uncovering His plan is that every time I think about what life will have in store, I have total peace. It used to scare me to death, what my future held. But now I don't feel pressure to do anything.

It may be confusing why I am doubting my choice in majoring in journalism now because everything seemed to be going swimmingly for me last year. But what if it isn't supposed to be that easy for me? What if I had stayed at Biola and continued in that major? How would I have grown as a person with everything planned out for me and laid at me feet, waiting for me to take it?What if I'm supposed to fight harder?
I don't think that's how its gonna work for me.

Another thing I have been thinking about....singleness. This used to be a touchy topic for me. I didn't like being single, although I had nothing to compare it too except for what I have seen. I have come to find, however, that I am perfectly content being single. Yes, there are times where Ithink otherwise. But other than that, singleness and I could be BFFs.

Pain never felt so Good

If you're wondering why I have't taken to the blog lately..well its because there wasn't much to blog about in my view. But a lot has happened in the last two weeks and now I have something to talk about. Which is exciting!

So, my days at school are long but I feel very studious, either stationing myself on campus somewhere secluded and doing homework and studied or napping in my car :) Its not too bad, I sometimes enjoy it; I just come home really tired and with my brain as jelly. I think I enjoy my spanish and pilates class the most. Spanish is probably my most difficult class too which is weird that I like it. Posible, me gusta hacer un desafio!
translation: I possibly like the challenge.

Pilates is definitley working me. Im always asking Ingrid " Feel my abs! Feel how hard they are now." But right now if you're imagining me with a flat tummy and a six-pack please erase that image from your mind because it depresses me and is a false image...for now :)
I always walk out of that class feeling stretched, flexed, strengthened and confident! Which is always good for a person, I believe.

My cousin Audrey got wedded about two weekends ago. Although I do not have pictures on my computer, I will try to post some soon. My mom constructed the wedding cake for the occasion. ANd it was not only delish but stunning. It was a french style "cake" although I wouldn't call it a cake but a tower of AWESOME!! it consists of creme puffs being glued together with caramelized sugar into a tower sort of thing. Then decorated as preferred. We did spun sugar and small white flowers. SO CLASSY! and we also dipped about 300-400 strawberries in milk and white chocolate. It all turned out amazing. There was small drama involved but I won't get into that.

Last weekend, I had the pleasure and joy of visiting friends at my former Biola. It was a very nice visit and it was good to see everyone....well almost everyone. It weird to come back as an outsider, per say, and see how the dynamics of friendships have changed and how things "go down." I won't go any more into that either. But it was a nice visit.

This last weekend, just passed, was quite the adventure.It was the weekend of first timing. I went up to BIg Bear with Oom Jopie and Ingrid. We stayed at friends', Marco and Ally, house Saturday night. Sunday morning, we went with Marco to the discover center, where he works, and went with him and his tourist group on a snowshoeing hike. They aren't the stereotypical snow shoes you think of. Ya know, the tennis rackets but they are more "high tech." Although the snow got kinda slushy later, it was an awesome event. That was my first time snowshoeing.
We had lunch at a little restaurant called Big Bear Manor. Why am I telling you the name of this place? What's its importance?
Well, 1. I thought it was a cute name
2. The place itself was cute and quaint
3. And most importantly, THEY HAD THE BIGGEST PANCAKES ID EVER SEEN!!
I had one. That was my first time having a pancake the size of a platter. YES A PLATTER! i kid you not, friend, I kid you not.
Go get one yourself if you do not believe.
After the settling of what felt like a pound of pancake, we went rock climbing. First time. Ok technically, thats a lie. I have been rock climbing but marco and ally don't think it is really rock climbing. It was one of those pathetic walls you find at fairs and such. SO anyways I went rock climbing. According to my hosts, they said the rock I was to climb was a 5 10 B, which is an advanced wall. Again, It was my first time. I was excited to try, thinking I could scurry up that rock like a spider. haha what a stupid ignorant fool I was.
I took me probably an hour to climb this was...at least. I would say it was about 35ft high. But I did it and I have never felt so proud of myself for anything! You're up there clinging to this rock by practically nothing and your arms and legs feel like their gonna give way and you're telling yourself, " How the heck did I think I could do this...piece of cake?!" But once you reach the top, you feel so free and strong and like you're the boss! It truly is an amazing feeling!

Well, this post is coming to a close because I am tired and sore as hell and need to sleep before early class tomorrow. My muscles are soo sore. Funny story....we were making dinner last ngiht after we had climbed and I sneezed. My abs contracted and hurt like a mutha!! I was like " acjoo....ahhhhoowwwwooooooh...gasp" they laughed at me. I'm hoping that my pilates class will loosen up my sore muscles and keep my intense workouts going!!!

Ok Im gone ya'll..like the money our government is trying to spend.
XOXO

DING DING DING

so winter session is over....

I GOT STRAIGHT A's!!


only in two classes though.....and they would be considered "easy" so...not that AWESOME but i dont care. im proud of me! yay!

Smeared

Reluctantly I am posting some of the work I've done in my drawing class

All done paper 24x20 in charcoal. Each takes about 8 hours to do. Bad lighting on the first one.

Where's my Head

Im exhausted! I dont know if its because I havent been going to bed early enough or if Im just not resting restfully. I wish i would sleep blissfully tonight and feel refreshed in the morning.

I have one more day and a week left of winter classes! hi-ya! As much as i have been enjoying my drawing class and breezing by in math, I would love to start spring semester. I am pretty excited for the new lineup. Im taking 17 units! yep yep Ill be keeping busy. Thank God!. Last semester was a total drag and I hated every moment of it but spring will hopping with interesting classes.
Im taking Physical Anthropology, Critical Thinking, Spanish, Math, Class Piano and Pilates. Im realy exited about pilates and piano!

Update on the baby kitty:
She is vivacious and simply delicious! she definitely lives up to her name. My hands burn when I put lotion on them from the open wounds she inflicted on me but she's totally worth it. dont believe me? I think you need to take a gander at the previous post, 'nough said.

Listening to: "Ragged Wood" Fleet Foxes

My epiphany

I think I understand why God has taken me out of Biola and brought me back home, so listen up and be intrigued!

My epiphany came to me with slow progression. Since, the summer I have been asking, nay, begging God why He made me leave my comfortable life at Biola, where I had friends who meshed with me so wonderfully and classes I actually enjoyed and were challenged in. Why did he make me go to the one school I swore to stay away from, thinking it was the scum of the educational system. And why he made me move back home, where I felt confined and restricted in my growth into the person I was becoming.
Thinking and trusting God would reveal his plan to me in time, I put up with a lot. I had the constant feeling of deep pain and betrayal that He would take from me something that seemed so perfect for me. I felt alone and depressed, being taken from my friends and comfortable environment. I have been struggling with my trust and faith in God and have taken out my anger on my family.
There's an artist I found on the radio and fell in love with how real he is in his music and how he sings his heart. I just bought his CD, which is amazing. His name is Brandon Heath and there's a song on the album called Trust You. Some of the lines say "I’m not gonna fight you anymore
Not gonna try to lock the door
You took your life and gave me yours
There’s no reason why
I shouldn’t trust you with mine

It’s never easy changing my direction
It’s so unnatural to loosen up my grip
Are you growing weary of all my good intentions
Cause I know that You don’t work that way."

I was just amazed at the simplicity but the depth of the truth in this song. I felt such shame and guilt for acting the way I have been and blaming God. I love how it says "you took your life and gave me yours. There's no reason why I shouldn't trust you with mine." After hearing this song, the epiphany completed itself in a wave of emotion. I felt relief that God really did have a plan for me. Stupid for taking so long to realize this. Joyful that my life seems to have a purpose and a hope again, my life is to serve and follow God, whereever he takes me. A priceless piece of Mother's wisdom, a phrase my mom tells me constantly, " God has a path paved for your life, its already done, we just receive new information leading us to the next step in that path."

So, and here it is!, as long as I trust God with my life, the one He has given and forgiven me, there is no need to fuss over anything. All in all have faith.